Long Ago Yesterday

 Long Ago Yesterday 6/10/2014

You might not remember

But I remember when I told you

That day, many years ago

When I promised

I would be the last man standing.

So much has changed

And deep down

I never felt worthy

Even though I tried

With all of my heart.

I didn’t know then

What I have learned since

That there is a flip side to everything

And that even pain

Can help you grow. 

It hurt

And it still does

Like a small pin prick

In the side of my chest

Spreading outwards like a bruise. 

I don’t belong here

And I never did

But that doesn’t mean

That I give up

And that doesn’t mean

That I don’t care. 

I am so far from perfect

And I have made many mistakes

But where I go from here

Is a choice

That I will make. 

Nothing is easy

And nothing is free

Except for what we give

And never expect to receive. 

If I don’t make it

You will know, that I tried

And I will still be

The last man standing

After all of this, is dead.

I tried to keep my promise

Please know, that I did

Even on the days

That I was tired

And even on the days

That I was dumb. 

And I will keep on praying

In the silent hours

As I watch the world blur

On my way, to somewhere else. 

For you, and for them

And all the others

That I have remembered

And will remember

Along the way.