Arise

Arise  10/31/2014

I was as dead
But now I live
And while once, I lost it all
I shall have it back again.

I am like a ghost

That haunts the living

But it took me long time

To become comfortable

In this alien skin.     

Where once, I suffered

Now I laugh

And where once, I was angry

Now I smile. 

It didn’t happen  in a day

And it didn’t happen in a month

But thank God

He found me

And pulled me up

By the roots.  

Come up, out of guilt

And shake the dust

Off your feet

Returning again

To what is real,

And what is true. 

Let others

Run around in circles

And let others

Think about the past. 

Busy protecting their reputations

And busy selling their souls

Watch them run

And watch them squirm.

It is not for me to say

And it is not for me to decide

So all I need to do

Is finish the race.    

I also, can walk the halls

And I also, can find my voice

Without fear

Or doubt. 

I am free as a ghost

Burning bright in flesh and blood

Able to transcend every barrier

Here or there.

Unafraid of living

And unrestrained by loathing

As I ride on the wind

Up and down.

Able to land where I will

And do barrel rolls

Over my enemies

Without guilt

Or self-loathing. 

I can forgive

And be forgiven

Wholly accepting

The love that I need

The kind

That lasts forever. 

At ease

Even as a stranger

In a strange land

And at home

Even as an alien without a country. 

Because this is all theirs

And not ours

So let them become trapped,

And stupid forever. 

But for me,

Let me have the freedom

And the peace 

The irreplaceable treasure

They will never understand.

They have their world

And we will have ours

One on its way down

And the other

That is to come. 

I will drive them mad

With my presence

And haunt them with my transcendence

As they flail in misery

And drown the dust.  

Creeper

Creeper 10/30/2014

Must be a million ways

To die without knowing

As destruction is always easier

Than living

And breathing. 

I could hold my breath

Until I float away

Locked in a trunk

Underneath the ocean.

Or I could curl up in bed

And pull up a black blanket

Burrowed under

Pills and booze.

But the journey upright

Calls me backwards

As I sit up

And try all over again.  

The sun still shines

Even when I am angry

And children still smile

Even when I am sad. 

And even strangers can be kind

Kinder than we are to each other

As we argue with family

Over nothing at all. 

We go on

Until there is no more

As we are spared from knowing

And remembering the end.

But the afterlife

Is not all that there is

As we witness

Each new day. 

A whole new world

Is always within reach

If only we knew

What to grasp. 

 

Split Second

Split Second 10/30/2014

Flicker flicker little flame

Burning hot and burning bright

All through the day

And all through the night. 

How many nightmares did you know?

And how many horrors

Have you seen?

In between cedar and elm

The dead, dying,

And blind.

We head around the corner

And out into the open

Where everyone can see

Vulnerable, immobile

Imperfect and dumb.

Offered up

As a blemished sacrifice

To be punctured and burned

In a few seconds of madness.

Nothing makes sense

And nothing seems certain

Until it comes down to money

And power.

What kind of secrets do we know?

And how far are we

From knowing?

Or understanding? 

People play at friends

And people play at enemies

Some fake

And some real. 

And no matter what you do

Or how careful, and alert

life happens

Both the good and the horrible.

So much that I thought

Turned out to be wrong

And so much that I feared

Turned out to be nothing.    

We stand

Mouths wide open

And yet we remain

Motionless and indecisive

Too afraid to live,

Or even ask why.

There will always be

More questions than answers

As we try and connect the dots

The best, that we can. 

We look for smoking guns

But that no longer matters

In a world off it’s axis

Illogical, hateful,

And murderously insane.     

We will know in the end

All it was, that we missed

But by then, it won’t matter

And we won’t care.   

Five Decades

Five Decades 10/29/2014

If I could

I would change it all

And go backwards in my mind

Soaking up every detail  

And making it all mine.

But in a way

We already have

As we remember it in words

For others to embrace,

Feel, taste, and touch. 

Nothing is lost

And nothing is hidden

As it still exists

In another place and time. 

Others have tried to erase

What it was,

That came before

But they did not succeed then

And they cannot now. 

Raging against invisible enemies

Spasmodically lashing out in violence

As evil seeks to possess

And destroy. 

It is the same old battle

For the same old reasons

As the heroic survive adversity  

And harvest the fruit.

Born with the golden leaves on our heads

We learn to despise and reject

Pissing on the rugs

Woven by hand. 

We reject the truth

And believe lies

As we dance around

A golden calf. 

Fools believe in themselves

And can justify any act

To get what they want

Altogether unaware

And dead in the head. 

The truth remains

Just as it always did

But it is we who forgot

And called it a lie. 

Darkness descends on the foolish

And the easily swayed

Neglectful of the children

Unprotected and pure. 

Don’t be afraid

To tell them like it is

The raw truth

Unvarnished and deadly.

Be not prey

Be not a victim

But instead choose well

And live forever.    

Tribute

Tribute 10/29/2014

We drank in the cemetery

And sweat in the sun

So we took refuge under a hardwood

And sat on the roots.

Of all the parties

This was the blackest

Chatting quietly

As if they could hear.

I walked around the tombstones

And calculated the dates

Mostly sons and daughters

Taken before their time.

It was a melancholy feeling

To know and to breathe

Enjoying a life underserved

And half understood. 

I guess its okay

If these words are insufficient

Because in the end

All we can do

Is our best at the time. 

I am searching for something

And I can only find

What is ahead

Or behind.

We live out our circumstances

And hopefully we stretch them out

Become something more

From the inside out. 

I stand on the shoulders of others

Far larger than me

And thus I am able to see farther

Than I ever could on my own. 

There may not be a laurel wreath

And there may not be a thanks

But gifts are just gifts

Be they large or small. 

This is what I have

Right here and right now

Let it be more

Than I think

And better than I deserve.

Either for me

Or for a stranger

We live out

What we have

So let it be more

And not less.

The drunks leave the party

And the dead rest in peace

All together we remain

Forever in words.