Double Zero

Double Zero 5/12/2014

A hand has come into my life

And torn everything apart

In the cruelest of ways

Painful and slow. 

I was fattened up

And slaughtered for fun

Left like an example

In the middle of the square.

Somehow I am here

But I am not the same at all

Damaged, empty, and ghostly

I walk and I speak. 

There are many ways to say it

But nothing can change the rub

Because here I am

Just as worthless as ever. 

I might be right

Or I might be wrong

But if you are the rejected

It will always feel the same.

A world has been shattered

And you must live with the pieces

Cutting yourself

Whether you want to or not. 

I can take it all with me

Or I can leave it behind

But no matter what I do

The damage is done. 

It’s as true now as ever

That we all need love

But some only have the need

To possess and have. 

Incapable of altruism

And cruelly manipulative

The never wander far

From the conventional or shallow.

This is their world

And we are just options

Just another door

Something to explore, exploit

And then discard. 

While we live in their world

It does not mean

That we must be of it

And that is why it hurts

And probably always will. 

So I do not ask

And I am not disappointed

But rather just bide my time

On my way to something else. 

All of this is done

And all of this is dying

As it spends itself out

In treachery and deceit. 

But the best part

Is yet to come

As we remember not

And smile.