The longest walk

Hurt Park                              2/24/2016

It will never be easy

Because the memory

Is just too heavy to lift

Crushing me down 

As I struggle to forget.

I slept with her sweater

Until the scent was gone

And I walked through

The same old streets

Over and over again. 

Stuck in an endless loop

And unable to escape

The unknowable cost

Of self-loathing

And regret. 

It is easier to forgive

Than it is to survive

Because words once spoken

Can never

Truly be swallowed. 

We do what we do

Even though

We know

Unable to stop

Resentment and emotion.

Others don’t know

And they remain

As we remember

Stuck in one dimensional pictures

And long lost feelings. 

The agony is all ours

And God only knows the truth

About why it all has to be

And what it is

We should learn. 

It hurt

And it made me angry

But still I wonder

And still I wait.

People do things

Inexplicable and strange

For all the worst reasons

Spoken and unspoken. 

The truth floats above my head

While I jump up and down

Slippery and elusive

Peaceful and perfect.

It has to be enough

That we just don’t know

But still we keep on trying

Even for nothing at all. 

All there is

Is faith

And prayer

Even if unanswered

And silent.

Whatever may come

We are together

All of us who try

And are forgiven.

But whatever the truth

Evil will yet slip

In due time

Falling backwards

Into nothingness.