Fingernail

Fingernail             8/12/2015

She drew me a circle 

And then she Xed me out

Until I had nothing left

An empty blank space

And a double zero ghost.

It was much too easy

That strange and surreal alienation

Pushing me out, into the fringes

Where I could barely hang on. 

I fell into a deep dark hole

And there I fell forever  

Never hitting the bottom

Empty handed, bleeding,

Ashamed and alone.

My spirit crushed

In a silent mausoleum

Where the phone never rang

And sleep would not come. 

There is the place

That I can never forget

Where I curled up

Under the blankets

And under the earth.

In the dark

You can hide your face

In a deep dark corner

Where no one knows your name.

This place is for the forgotten

And a place for thoughts and people

The kind we would rather avoid

And ignore.

Frightening because of their memory

And painful because of their wounds

Hell on earth

And hanging from a ledge.

Twisting from a thread

And yet somehow surviving

An uncomfortable reminder

That all comfort and ease

Are temporary

And gone in an hour. 

But even this is a blessing

If you have learned
How to hang

The same person

On the top

That you were on the bottom. 

Hold on to this

Because that is all we have

The only thing that lasts

To be tirelessly good

And tirelessly faithful.