Angel Hair

Angel Hair                12/16/2015

I didn’t have anything

Until I lost everything

Indulged, dumb

Wasted and young.

I didn’t know a thing

So I only wanted more

Impatient with the present

Petulant and spoiled. 

Bored with everything

And sitting on a treasure

Unable to appreciate 

The greatest gifts of all.

Unwitting, unblemished

Fattened and soft

Offered up as a sacrifice

Unknowing and unprepared.

But the death of foolishness

Is not death at all

Nothing but a test

And a trial. 

None of it was mine

But I never knew it then

Owning nothing

But owing everything. 

That is the loss

And that is the awakening

Cold, brutal,

Sudden, and sharp.

Loneliness was a burden

Much too heavy to lift

Breaking me down

And pulling me apart.

In the end

I had almost nothing

Numb to almost everything

Exhausted, and spent.

I did not find God

Because it was God

That found me

Paying off my debt

Once and for all.

He brought me here

So that I could see

Finally able to grasp

What really matters.

Now I sleep in the castle

And now I plumb the depths

For treasure

Discovering more

Than I ever dreamed. 

In the basement

I found the paintings

In great gilded frames

Extravagant and thick.

But in the attic

I found the angels

Perfectly formed

As if from dreams

Hung on the wall

And hung on a tree.

Everything that I was

And everything that I dreamed

Coming together

Fuller and richer

Than ever before.

No matter where

We have been

And no matter what

We have done.

All can be restored

A thousand times better

Understood and appreciated

Better than before.

It can be won

And it can be lost

That much I know

But now that I see

I know I can survive.

Even if we lose

We still must try

Because we own nothing

But will inherit

Everything.