Wasted

Wasted 3/13/2012

The wind up motor
Slows down towards the end
Slower and slower
Until is stops
Motionless, inert,
Dumb and dead.

Our bodies slow
Until they stop
Aging and aging
And rotting in death.

Ceaseless is the ebb and flow
As time and physics
Dance in a circle
And merciless is the curse of death
With no way out
And no way through.

The dull pain of life
Follows us
No matter where we go
And no matter what we do
Ever present
And aching.

We try
And we flail
Wind milling our arms
But nothing ever changes
And nothing ever will.

It is the mind numbing hours
That can drive you to madness
We strike out in desperation
To find something
Or anything to give meaning
To the sterile blandness of life.

Worn down by time
And slowed by inertia
We stay in place
And wait for death.

Running in place
And running on empty
The ideas form
In our fevered brains.

That draw of darkness
That quickens the heart
As we press through the day
With our feet to the floor.

Hell bent on suicide
And roaring to oblivion
Straining and whining
Faster and faster.

Running hot and heavy
And melting down the tires
Scraping metal and metal
Grinding down to nothing.

Everything is burned away
With nothing for the sparks to ignite
Heading into the nothingness
That stretches out forever.

Lost in the dry heat
That sucks up all the water
Leaving an endless wasteland
In the middle of your mind.

That is the place
Where hell meets the road
Where desperation leads to horror
And boredom to violence.

Where the silence of the day
Makes you want to scream
And come out swinging.
Just to prove you are alive
And awake.

That is the dead space
In the middle of nowhere
With nothing to stop you
And nothing to restrain you.

Far away from everything
And forgotten
Pressing down on the gas
Just to get shake off the dust.

To embrace the desire
To break out of expectations
To get away clean
And get away fast.

In a world of slow movements
And stifled dreams
The days last forever
And the nights are blacker than death.

And the horizon stretches out forever
No matter how far you go
Reaching ever further
In optical allusions.

So we go on and on
And if we don’t die
We grow on the inside
Until we outgrow our shell
And become who we are.

The great equalizer awaits
And the reaper gathers his own
Collecting all the souls
But leaving the seeds.

The endless words come out
And leave a trickle on the ground
Just another day wasted
And just another day done.

Yeah, I know the feeling
And yeah, I know it well
Just as deep as it is painful
Purposeless and bored.

I was wasted
And I was picking up speed
Wasting my passions
Without a thought or plan.

But now I have stopped
With my wheels still spinning
Looking backwards
Tired and bleeding.

As good a time as any
To find a place to start
Because we have places to go
And promises to keep.

Picking up the pieces
And holding each one
In no hurry to find
What I already had.