The Vacuum

The vacuum 08/19/2010

A fraction of thought that makes me human
And the feeling of sand between my toes
Endlessly dreaming of elusive love
As hard to capture as it is to know
Like a gust of wind against my face.

I poured the whiskey up to the brim
And wished I was anywhere but home
Alone in a world so full of people
Friendless and lost.

Even the bitter past seems better
Than the horrible loss of feeling
Deadening all dreams and desires
Empty as the vacuum of space.

Miles above my head
And miles below my feet
Just same as being here
Strange, alien and out of place.

I loved her I loved her more than anything
But I silently let her drift away
Waiting for some kind of uncontrollable emotion
The one that never came.

I wanted to run after
But she left that for me to decide
How cruel our awkward defenses
The ones that keep us pretending.

A greater risk I have taken
The lonely path to self destruction
When all I ever had to say
Was to ask.

I could never make up my mind
And how easily was I distracted
Just long enough to miss the here and now
And continue in misery.

It took a long time to get rid of the sand
The grains in my shoes lasted forever
But how easily does love disappear
Through the fingers of my trembling hands.