The Burning Couch

It has killed many
And it will kill more
Swallowing them down
And leaving them to rot
In the belly of darkness
In a deep black hole.

The horror of addiction
Is deep and dark
Pulling you in
And never letting go.

Where day and night
Have no meaning
And all the weeks a blur
Always looking to score
And always wanting more.

Reality is painful
And sobriety a horror
As we look for something
To make us forget.

Deluded by euphoria
And numbed to the pain
Dependent on something
Just to help us cope
Until we waste away
Without conscience or hope.

Some commit suicide
And some lash out in anger
Carried by the current
Of delirium
And madness.

Some don’t care
If they live or die
Because they’re in too deep
And cannot escape.

Without the will to live
And unable to eat
Lying naked on the couch
With your skin on fire.

There is no escape from living
And oblivion can last forever
Loveless, senseless
Terrifying and complete.

The most courageous things
Often pass unnoticed
And the greatest of decisions
May remain unknown.

You cannot save others
If you can’t save yourself
And there is no wound so deep
That God cannot heal.

You can help
And you can pray
But in the end
We must make a choice
Life or death
Truth or lie.


5/15/2012 By Rob McManus

The Debt Collector

The Debt Collector 5/14/2012

Some people get what they want
But there's never enough for all
Shoved aside in the excitment
As they drop their heads
To feed at the trough.

The pie never gets bigger
And nothing stays the same
As someone else decides
Who shall live
And who shall die.

Someone has to pay the price
And someone has to go without
Swallowing their pride
And hanging their head.

Such is life
As we know it
An ever growing pecking order
Moving up or moving down
Changing with the times
And the vagaries of man.

There is always lots of help
When life is easy
But none can be found
When you need it the most.

Everybody wants to be the boss
And everybody thinks
That they are a leader
But the wisest men
Seldom seek false glory.


Not given to the weakness
Of pride and speeches
The kind we have all heard
Rising and falling
With hypocrisy and bile.

Instead they work
Staying out of the way
And staying out of trouble
But hiding will not save
The many from the few.


We get what we deserve
Another day older
And deeper down a hole
Owing more and more
Because of indecision
And cowardice.

A long day’s coming
And a long night’s lament
The future we asked for
But hoped to avoid.


Reality is calling
And we all run for cover
Hiding behind false hope
As all our dreams
Are overrun.

It’s hard to get credit
When the future is black
And it’s hard to keep on going
With ten men on your back.

All the money in the world
Cannot buy a lost future
Indebted to a promise
Long lost and fruitless.

No one wants to pay
Once the balance is due
So they just pass it along
And add it up another tick.

The squeaky wheel gets the grease
And the loudest mouth will get the reward
Upside down and backwards
The wasted expenses
Fudged over and passed along.

There is no rest
And there is no remorse
As we trudge upwards
In spite of the weight.

Someday and somehow
Everything will be paid
Paid back in blood
And paid back in sorrow.

I owe plenty
But it’s a lot
More than money
But either way
I will pay
On time, and in full.

You cannot kill the dead
And you cannot destroy the spirit
Untraceable and undeniable
Rising up from the shadows.

Beating at their conscience
And knocking at their door
Breaking ever window
And rising from the floor.

Collecting the debts
And all the interest too
Dishing out the penalties
Of life, limb and more.

Metal Flake

Metal flake 5/11/2012

I remember metal flake
Everywhere on everything
Glittering deep and reflecting the sun
In the long summer days
Dead and gone.

My dad’s boat bounced off the waves
As we dragged my sisters on skis
And how I loved the water in my face
White, frothy
Pure and alive.

Everything seemed possible
And everything was promised
With everything ahead of me
And nothing behind
But laughter.

We drank RC cola
And walked to the drug store
Shopping in stores that no longer exist
And walking on sidewalks
Vacant and lost.

There were book stores
And there were diners
Boutiques and haberdashers
All gone and blown away.

Life must be nurtured
Cultivated and fed
Lest it be overused
Wasted, desolate
Alien and dead.

Overrun and overused
As greedy hands destroy
But never build
Such is the waste
And such is the truth.

Unrecognizable are the ghost towns
Where no one cares
And no one remains
Victims of convenience
And mindless politics.

Time is fleeting
But even evil
Shall wither and die
Killing itself with neglect
And indifference.

It is the nature of man
To fall and rise
But the truth still stands
For those that are willing.

For me it is time
To rebuild and renew
Scrubbing away the tarnish
And buffing out the scars.

Because I am alive
And my children are worth it
The hard work of life
And the necessity of preservation.

A new patina
With the lustre of the past
And a new hope
For greater glory.

Taking back what is ours
Piece by piece
And brick by brick
Building a new world
With pieces of the past.

Angel in Black

5/10/2012

Angel in Black

I loved an angel
An angel dressed in black
With fire in her eyes
And acid on her tongue.

We haunted the coffee shops
Book stores and antique markets
Always searching for something
To feed our hungry souls.

There were many perfect moments
And numberless conversations
Leaning across tables
Or lying in bed.

She was my other half
A perfect partner
And a flawless savior
For my perverted mind
And twisted soul.

The steam from the coffee
Curled up in the air
Swirling between our faces
And softening the light.

Her thoughts were my thoughts
And all things were possible
A conspiracy of wit
Of two old souls.

She was like a miracle
Like water from a rock
Food for the soul
And fuel for the fire.

We wrote each other poems
But hers was better than mine
And she memorized every line
Reading from the heart.

I can still hear her voice
In the quiet stillness
Steady, calm and peaceful
In the back of my mind.

I will never forget the last two lines
Forever stuck in my memory
That”no matter what the future brings
I will always Rob love you”.

The words haunt me
But there is nothing I can do
An experience of a different person
In an altogether different time.

No matter how much time passes
I will never leave that place
A perfect moment trapped in amber
Preserved forever
And richer with time.

Looking backwards
The contrast is clear
That I am a different man
With one foot in the present
And another in the grave.

I sleep and I dream
And I awaken to the world
A reality without color
Gray and indistinct.

I am numb to the world
And all my senses are dulled
Never again as sensitive
And never again as alive.

The future came for us
And brought with it
Highs and lows
Twisting and turning in unexpected directions
And looping over on itself.

We were dragged apart
By circumstances out of control
As thoughts, feelings and actions
Inexplicably interfered.

We still speak
But at a great distance
Separated by a frozen ocean
And agonizing heartbreak.

I have fallen far below
And I am falling still
With only memories for comfort
And no faith in man.

My arms have found a handhold
But climbing back, takes forever
When you are gravely wounded
And twice as old.

I still don’t know the future
And death is a one way hole
But better it must be
Than life dead and cold.

That is where my heart is
In the unknown places
A deep and dark mystery
Collapsing inwards.

If heaven awaits
Then that is where I’ll know
The answers to these questions
And the peace of God.

A place for kindred spirits
Co mingled into one
Without a beginning or an ending
First, last, and forever.

Hang to Dry

Hang to Dry 5/4/2012
Rob McManus

I guess this is real
And its not like a movie
Where the good always win
At the very last second.

Sometimes we get what we want
And sometimes we don’t
And sometimes help arrives
And sometimes they are too late.

Maybe you are like me
Lumped together in the middle
At best another cog in the wheel
Force Fitted into a slot
Over and over again.

Designed to last
But built to fail
Because we just keep going
Until we get too old,
Beaten, and frail.

Giving it our best
And giving it our all
Used up until the end
And then forgotten
Or left at the curb.

Such is the life
In the heart of a grinder
Working to survive
And pay for everyone else.

Too busy to speak
And too tired to scream
We are the quiet
And the abused.

Like dead soldiers
Buried all in a row
Forgotten by the spoiled
Who have never sacrificed
And will never know.

It could be worse
But it’s kind of hard to remember
With all that we have seen
And all that is done.

If you watched the news
Then you have seen the lies
And if you have seen the carnage
Then you know who has died.

The biggest bang of all
Is always down the road
As we keep on going
With less and less.

The future opens up
Into a million possibilities
But it’s getting smaller
And narrower
With every decision
And drop of blood.

But if you are looking
For something more
Make sure you look in the right place
Instead of bashing your head
And cutting up your face.

Make sure that you are heard
And love with all of your might
Embracing the chaos
And making it your own.

Because if we are to hang
Then let us hang freely
Kicking in the air
And one of a kind.

To exit this world
Without regret
Having lived and died with honor
Every step
And every day.

The real life is coming
Because this is just a test
Just a dream without a heart
And a farce without a soul.

Keep the flame burning
And always seek the truth
Growing ever larger
Up the stairs
And over the hole.

Counterpunch

Counterpunch   5/3/2012 

It is enough to turn your stomach

And enough to make you cry

That everything you are

Or ever were

Is thrown away and trashed.

Over whelmed and overun

Denied, ridiculed, and rejected 

Detroyed from behind
What no one ever dared
To stare in the eye.


Grabbing you by the guts

And pulling you inside out

Up, down, side, to side,

And never letting go. 

Caught in the crossfire

And shot by both sides
Hung up the heels
And dragged in the dirt.

Reality is here

And there is nothing pretty about it

Another day falling downward

And closer to the end. 

Rome is burning

And no one says a word

Because fear grips the good

And evil men

Roam the street.

No one wants to get dirty

But the silent

Are drenched in blood

Giving up too easily 

To the dumb, worthless, and dead.

Empty words

Are no better than lies
Just another hand out
And pearls before swine.

It is midnight
And all is quiet
A heavy handed silence
You can cut with a knife.

Nothing means anything

And all of this you see
Is nothing but a joke
Just another fantasy
That will all go up in smoke.

Some people see others

And some people only see themselves
Finding their own reflection
In everything and everyone.                    

I will keep going

But I cannot see where

With just enough to keep me moving

And nothing but these words

Left to share.

You can call it

Whatever you want
But I don’t have a choice
And I don’t really care.

It has been too long

To wish any different
And I have seen enough
To know how it ends.

If you thought

It would end badly
Then you were definitely right
But this war is not really over
And I have barely joined the fight.

If you know who it is

And you know
From where its coming
You can absorb the blows
And shrug them off.

But the answer

Has been waiting
For the longest time
Held back until the end
At the point of no return
Across a line in the sand.   

Now that we know the sting
Then its time to trade the punches
Answering the first
With the first of the last.

If you have lived enough
Then you should know it by now
That if we don’t do it
Maybe no one will.  

Let the future wonder

How we could be so wrong
But on the right side of liberty
Is where I’ll rest my head.

Let there be no doubt
About who, what, and where
Because good will win
As long as truth survives.

Blacker

Blacker 5/1/2012 By Rob McManus

The future happens fast

At a high rate of speed

Flashing by at an instant

Until they blur

And melt away.

Pieces spin in the air

And disappear in the smoke

As a cloud of blood

Explodes everywhere. 

Glass and mirrors become a mosaic

As metal burns metal

Grinding and twisting

Until nothing remains. 

It only takes a second

To change everything you know

But help is always

Minutes or hours away. 

Projectiles fill the air

And rain sideways

In sheets

Like an iron waterfall

Of hot gray lead.

Another day

And another night

Slowly dying inside of myself

Used up and thrown aside

With tubes and needles

Everyplace and everywhere. 

The quick and the dead

And the good and the guilty

At high noon in America

Inexplicable and horrific.

Sweating and shivering on the couch

Without any hope at all

Unable to go on

And unable to stop

In a night of a hundred deaths

Not far from here

You may never know

What it feels like

To call out for help

And get no answer. 

To plead for mercy

And be cut off at the knees

By the cruel and unmerciful

And left to die in a ditch.

Let the sun burn away

And the wounds bleed

Festering and throbbing

In the cold dark sun.

My heart is black

Blacker than black
Blacker than the suit I wore
When I said goodbye
Darker than the midnight sun
On the other side of the world.

Squeeze shut your eyes

And cup your hands
Over your ears
To forget the day
And sleep in a hole.

Dream a dream of perfection

Because that is all you’ll get
Nothing but a ride down a highway
In a long black car.

Spin your wheels

And try with all your might
But you can’t get far
If someone else
Holds the keys.

Tell the pretty women

To all leave this place
Because I can’t look anymore
Without dying. 

Tell the fools and the liars
That this dead ender is done
Because I have had enough
For a hundred lifetimes.

I am coming for them

In a single minded fury
With nothing left to lose
And the whole world to gain
Black as night
And black as death.

I am the pale angel
With a heart of blackened iron
As I take up my wings
On my way to paradise.

I shall come down
Faster and faster
With the air stinging my face
Coming home with furious anger
Stirring up hell
In a cloud of dust.